Shrinkage

I’ve had awful sleep the past few days. A lot of this is the simple result of teetering off some teetotalling edge Saturday night, perhaps, but I’m rather skeptical. But however much it is to blame, there’s other reasons why I’m having persistent nightmares, why I’m frustrated, why I feel incapable of expressing myself, etc. No one cares.

But this might be rather entertaining, despite this webpage’s not being a dream diary. Last night, I kept writing songs for my band (perhaps Der Motorikrhythmuszug, but we’re not positive), but they all had the same melody. And that melody was “I Walk the Line.” So, to remind everyone that I’m going nuts over here, let’s review the lyrics and make our own interpretations. And guess what? Each interpretation will be correct. Goddamn I love this place. I can’t wait for it to be October. Anyway,

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
I keep my eyes wide open all the time
I keep the ends out for the tie that binds
Because you’re mine, I walk the line

I find it very, very easy to be true
I find myself alone when each day is through
Yes, I’ll admit that I’m a fool for you
Because you’re mine, I walk the line

As sure as night is dark and day is light
I keep you on my mind both day and night
And happiness I’ve known proves that it’s right
Because you’re mine, I walk the line

You’ve got a way to keep me on your side
You give me cause for love that I can’t hide
For you I know I’d even try to turn the tide
Because you’re mine, I walk the line

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
I keep my eyes wide open all the time
I keep the ends out for the tie that binds
Because you’re mine, I walk the line

This was Cash’s first hit. I think that of the Cash canon, it may be the best song. “Ring of Fire” is too dramatic (and maybe too expected). This has such a level of austerity (here we go…) that it sort of surprises itself (and the listener) at how basic the emotion, the expression, the desire for validation can be. Sure, the “Because you’re mine” phrase creeps me out a bit, but that just underscores the depth of attachment–that we have to invent a language of commodity on top of the language that’s failed us in the previous three lines.

So why I’m having nightmares (despite having not heard the song maybe since Cash died…) about persistently re-writing this song, however…