Advancing the Plot

Hommages, especially when they’re coming from a mile away, seem to be sort of dumb in my book. But I won’t sit here and lie and say that, even with this all coming from a mile away, already obvious (I thought of it already when Marissa showed up at Alex’s soaking wet), etc., etc… I still started crying when, with Seth dangling from the roof of his home with his Spiderman mask on, Summer pulled enough away to make the fuck out with him in the torrential rain as, The O. C., after weeks of teasing and buildup, finally closed some serious doors in anticipation of rerunning last year’s episode that featured Paris Hilton talking about Thomas Pynchon.

I already have gone on about how much I liked last week’s episode. Steve didn’t, telling me he wasn’t even going to write about it because it was a “transitional” episode, the set-up for this week’s rain-soaked cathartic orgy. Perhaps. But, as I told him then, it’s the transitional episodes that are important, as they’re the ones that reëxpress the thematic technologies of the show. If you just pay attention to the hits, you miss what the whole album is saying. Still, there’s a lot to be said about the hits.

The episode began with two rather peculiar conceits that seemed detached from usual O. C. fare. First, Blind Melon got dropped? I guess they were sort of like emo hippies, but hardly appropriate. Then again, using Boys II Men’s “End of the Road” to fuel the Summer/Seth spiral of despair was equally absurd. But, of course, rain in the O. C. is absurd, so I’ll grant these lapses. The other conceit was the JUST KISS ALREADY opening between Seth and Ryan. Both needed to do their heteronormative venting, but neither one wanted to be the one to submit and get soaking wet to go talk to the other. Instead, they watched each other talk through windows, which is a little, I dunno, working on some serious disbelief suspensions saved for phonesex, I’d think. By which I mean, I’m agnostic on the future of Ryan and Seth doing anything, but if they were, this’d be the first sign the show gave, I think. Note, however, that both boys had no trouble getting soaking wet for their ladies, though, which just goes to show that when submissiveness is prefigured by the illusion of the privacy of a sexual relationship, guys are willing to do it.

Much of the good stuff to track is already covered here, including the great lines about Julie Cooper Nichol’s past with a lot of Mötley Crüe and Jäger. That’s a lot of umlauts. I’m in! It did take me a while to figure out how Marissa’s sleeping with another woman is comparable to sleeping with an entire band of men, but then I remembered what the men looked like, I guess. I can only add my liking the appreciative diss of the “Pussy Wagon” in Kill Bill, by having Seth’s catamaran renamed from the “Summer Breeze” to the GIMME SEX. I’ll never forgive Q’s using an extended joke about rape to set up such a lame joke as the “Pussy Wagon,” and this was an appropriate response.

Also, the Summer/Seth stuff needs more discussion. The writers have clearly launched this into genius status with the way Summer finally collapsed at the airport. To recap: Summer is going to Tuscany to be in Zach’s sister’s wedding party. Why this closeness? Because, as Zach explains, his sister is “alienating and severe,” and, as such, has no friends. Summer starts getting doubts, which are highlighted when her taste in magazines is completely different from Zach’s family’s. (His mom asks for a copy of the “Economist,” but the sister asks for a “Xanax.”) Then, while buying her trashy People or whatever, she sees a three year old boy playing with a toy horse. This is right after Seth unintentionally came upon his winning play for Summer—pretend to be Captain Oats on a voicemail.

But it gets better. Not only is the little boy playing with a horse, but he has goofy, bushy, black hair. And is dressed in three year old hipster garb—long-sleeve tee under a thrift storey short-sleeve collared shirt. He is, then and there, a spot-on representation of Seth Cohen. It was hilarious.

But it gets better. Summer and Seth’s knowing each other since childhood is part of what motivates my reading of them as siblings in the racialised narrative of the show. This is further evidenced by the fact that Summer is frequently dismissive to Seth for his immaturity. And here she sees a three year old and realises that she’s, you know, in love with a three year old and that’s all there is to it. She abandons Zach, who in his understanding (shocked she even made it past security without running to Seth) attitude qualifies as maybe the greatest guy ever, and we get the Spider-Man hommage, and I’m crying. That she loves a (pre-procreative) three year old might be a little fucked up, but it fits into the list of anti-miscegenation technologies I’ve already discussed regarding The O. C.

As this storyline moves to this resolution of keeping it in the family, Sandy and Kirsten get back together, too. This proves that it’s possible to erect structures that encourage mixing, and to even talk yourself into believing in them. But that Sandy could come so close to trashing his marriage without even properly realising the damage until it was almost too late proves that it’s easy to forget those structures. I don’t think much of Kirsten’s threatened tryst with the fake Luke Perry in two weeks, either.

As for Lindsey, the writers used a conceit to avoid the psychic blood that would have eventually been spilled, I think. Blood was proven, but the maternal line was shown to be stronger than the paternal. Who knows. I’m mostly excited that she’s gone because this guarantees that Ryan is going to start making some big, big mistakes pdq in the Coop department, and his position as outsider will start making some serious waves again, but in deeply ambivalent ways. I guess that’s a kind of empty sentence. Fuck you, it’s Friday afternoon.

Mostly, I just want to think about that scene with the kiss again. I haven’t downloaded the episode yet, so I don’t know the exact words, but Seth says something like, while hanging upside down, “Summer? What are you doing here?” Summer responds with, “You know what I’m doing here” and making out ensues. Man. I’m tearing up just typing that.

Stoney: I addressed Julie back in December:

With that sentiment, he explains that setting of the show is perpetually functioning on concentric circles of incest. At the center of Newport is the Newport Group, headed by Caleb and his daughter. His daughter, however, married an outsider instead of Jimmy. Jimmy, also, married an outsider, but Julie was more than able to assimilate herself to the center. She was the daughter Caleb did not have—the one that appreciated and fit into Newport. So what does Caleb do? He marries her.

The next new episode figures to be a stinker, except for the pleasant return of brooding Ryan.