the next item for my agenda for today is making a list of things i can’t have anymore. here’s a sneak preview:
1) breakfast cereal
2) breakfast
3) peanut butter with or without candy embedded in it
4) ice cream
5) chewing tobacco
6) eye contact
7) eye contact surrogates such as squeezing of hand or gentle touching
#8) refined sugar
[T]he amount of eccentricity in a society has generally been proportional to the amount of genius, mental vigour, and moral courage which it contained. That so few now dare to be eccentric, marks the chief danger of the time.–john stuart mill, On Liberty, 1869
whoops! i’d say YOU FUCKED UP john stuart mill. sorry, i’m usually right there with you, from the nervous breakdown to angry fear of LDS, but this time you’re just wrong.
item: what if someone made quirky, world-weary adult entertainment in a direct ripoff of Wes Anderson, i.e. Gushmore, The Royal Tanenboners, The Life Erotic? wouldn’t this put emo lifestyle porn a la Diablo Cody the fuck out of business? Am i way off base here? i’m going to e-mail this to Jim Lehrer and see if newshour wants to cover it. offer an exclusive
item: the designer furniture store down the street from my office (one of approx 20 such stores within 1000 feet of my office) has a bullshit fake epigram on its window, to make people scratch their chins before plunking down a sack of blood diamonds for a eames coathook: it says “WHAT YOU MAKE IS IMPORTANT”–Fred Smoot (not his real name). today i walked by it and was like yes, WHAT MONEY YOU MAKE IS IMPORTANT GABONGGGGGGGG FUCK YOU NEW YORK CITY
That is all.
BONUS ITEM: overheard in work elevator: “it’s like ansel adams but in color”
if there is one guiding principle i follow in my life as a holy man, i would like to think or at least suggest that it be “i’m not about to deface this property for ‘[your bullshit].” which is why i went ahead and waited until the first round of the playoffs were over before giving you my predictions about what is going to happen in the playoffs. WHICH ARE:
phillies-dodger series ends tied at 4 each (both teams won game 3). unsure how to proceed. as a result, the dodgers advance when pat burrell loses in penalty checkers shootout against hideki kuroda
please god can the red sox lose. that’s not strictly a prediction, but it is a sentence.
condor bonus track only on vinyl release
subway car
condor is reading some stuff for work. spends 40 mins of 41 minute train ride, after reading one page, adjusting his neck to see which head posture makes his chin look the best.
bonus bonus track
then his head melts and he doesn’t have a chin anymore
